Friday, December 22, 2006

Kill Me

I`m a bad person.

I was having such a nice day. I enjoyed each and every moment of it so much that I didnt even get time for posting a blog entry until just now. Well, technically, its been more than one day, but it never really seemed like two different days. We slept at 2 am I guess and woke up again at 6:30 am and continued out chatting. (I hadn't ever talked to him so much and got to know him way better throughout the day than I ever did before. I had even talked to him about this subject - how many friends did I know really well. That was when I realized I had never known any of my friends as good as I know some now. Thats because back then I wasn't even mature enough to think about all this. And like Sam, even I think too much. Thats what lead me to writing this entry.) Then went to see Kabul Express, we were a little late though, but I had seen it before so it was ok. I told him the parts that we missed. Then I dropped him off at shivajinagar and that was the end of the fabulous day with Sam. Then went and gave the exam. What happened after that, I`ll regret for many days to come.

Today I disappointed both pranav and Abhinav even after thinking I would somehow manage both. I tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end, it doesn't even matter I had to fall to loose it all, but in the end, it doesn't even matter. I called up samrat to know if he`s sure whether there was x box 360 in the cafe on F.C. road but even he was not sure. I knew that simply playing game together won't be enough. Abhinav wanted me to come to his house but with Pranav wanting to use the pc at my home to connect his hdd and delete the pesky antivirus, it was going to be difficult. NO! actually it was impossible.

I called up Aniruddh bhaiya to find out if I had the time. hoping that maybe something will come up and I`ll be able to go with my friends. But he said that we`d go for shopping as soon as I got back home so I had to leave. I just stood there with a miserable look on my face. I didn't know how I could tell both of them that I had to go. I just did it anyhow. Abhinav seemed to take it very well. He said he was expecting this to happen. He left. I was left with Pranav gazing into my eyes. His usual blank stare. As if trying to read my mind(and I`m sure he was successful at that). So I couldn't have said anything more to him. I just spoke out in the "sorry"est tone I could "kill me, I`m a bad person" and he smiled and said "sach mein?" And frankly, I wouldn't have minded if he really did.


  1. I read this post very late.

  2. well, atleast you did. And I don't think it changes anything really.